the swell is big
it goes over me
under
even inside

little rolled balls of darkness fall in
and disappear

oh, do I fear darkness
oh, do I fear depth

I climb up the mountain
and reach the valley
where people go to die
where silence takes over
where darkness is not present in such light

the swell is big
it washes the valley
it washes me

over the bay many suns set
the wings and the horseshoes
remain

when the horses disappear into the cloud
I rest my head on a stone
lay myself on the ground
and listen

I stared through the window and waited for the rain to start. I could see it soaking the mountains and messing up the glassy surface of the bay, eventually it took over the horses and the neighbour's house

still I sat there at the window and waited for the rain to come here

but snow came instead

the men I love, the men I don't love


(Annette Messager)

will we ever walk under the same sun again

j.e.m.r.q.

I can still smell you here while you're on the other side of the globe

deep

it's deep
my mind
and
my search
is

and
the forests
are deep

*

there
I'll tie
my
slender hands
to you

unit
unanimously
united

unification
unite
unity

to rain

cut out

refrain
vain
blame
stain
pain

retain
vail
gain
trail

(The order of the words can be different as the floating meaning remains. It's like the words that one randomly picks from a conversation which one vaguely follows.)

let the storm hit
I want it real

don't play it
don't pull those silly faces
don't look at others


let it be real

let it all be real

real

...
vanish in the autumn's mist
thick evening's air
so tear clear
fear
is what comes after
comes after me
goes after
or ahead
grows inside
or above
I tear
the gallons
and the seas
that do not belong to me
I borrow them
never return
home either
or do I not know time
yet

is it the howling winds of the nights or soothing
spells of the days that brought me up

they say I inherited fear

but in my dreams I'm still an explorer

someone else

it was only the leaves swirling in the wind that had color then
the rest was a mirage - objects with no clear shapes, colors or names

dream is not reality
and reality is not a dream

why chase one when you have another and vice versa
why someone else's cup of tea always tastes better

why the color of my eyes changes after each rain and never gets back to its original

I've sinned

could love be served straight?

tear clear

through poppy field I run
to catch and befringe

with tear clear thread

shadows of the cranes
heading south


after the last rain

ballad of my autumns

I heard pears falling onto my roof again
and saw the stars mirrored onto all other skies at once

three steps back, where..

where

where frozen smiles and joys were left to age
while tears and fears were tighten to my slender feet



now would I climb that roof again with

such

weight on me

shiver